《周末》

文｜红岭牧翁

八月里的一个周末，我们在曼哈顿过：我，我的另一半——妻子，儿子以及儿子八个月大的女儿——我们的孙女。儿媳因事恰巧出城了；女儿因事也只能和我们呆半天。

我是很少出门的；出门在外不自由、累，住旅店更是不习惯。这次是去看孙女，这些“问题”好像全给忘了。我的另一半更是一大早就起了床；为了早一刻见到他们，她准备了我们倆在车上吃的花生酱涂面包。一反常态地：我们在预计出发时间之前出了门！

天气很好。今年的夏天虽热，但秋天确来得比晚年早。一下子，天变得更高、更蓝，云变得更白、更艳，风吹得更轻、更舒服，阳光也变得格外温柔……这一切变化使人产生一种感觉——人生多么美好。

儿子把我们到达后的一切都已安排妥当：到达的那个下午，女儿也来儿子家，大家一起聊天、喝咖啡，晚上一起吃晚饭；星期天，女儿出城，我们四人则去中央公园野餐。

也不知从什么时候开始，我的性情变顺从了：对儿子和女儿所做的事情或所安排的事情都是放心有加，甚至可以说是言听计从的。我现在就像我晚年的父亲听我的话一样，顺从着儿女的安排。

孙女刚刚八个月。两个月不见，她的变化真大。她从她姑姑那里新学来了摆头舞；我们让她表演，她就有模有样地摇晃了起来。与同龄孩子相比，她表情丰富，总是咯咯地笑；有时还会有意地扮着脸儿“逗”大人笑。

晚餐是饺子、女儿和儿子的最爱，也是我妻子的“拿手菜”。妻子擀饺子皮，女儿帮着包。用餐前，儿子先给孙女喂饭。孙女顽皮，把吃在嘴里的东西再吐出来、抓在手里玩一会儿，然后或是撒在地上、或是再放进嘴里吃。我见后，立马就想去清理掉在地板上的东西。儿子却淡淡地说：“爸，不急，等她吃完后再打扫。”“只要她吃得开心，把一些东西撒在地上没有关系，吃完后打扫一下就可以了。”儿子继续说。

听儿子说完，我才猛地清醒过来：自己的那些育儿“经验”以及照看婴儿的处理方式和心态，还停留在30年前。时过境迁呀！

儿媳和儿子规定：孙女必须在晚上八点半左右睡觉。儿子知道他自己的作息时间不好——他是“夜猫子”。所以，他不想把自己的“不好”传给下一代。八点钟的时候，儿子给孙女换上了睡衣，让她睡在自己独立的房间。房间里有电子监控摄像系统，父母能够全程从各个角度监控到孩子睡觉时的情况。看到孙女睡觉时不盖任何毯子类的东西，我的另一半有点担心并试探性地的问：“她晚上不再盖点东西行吗？不冷吗？”儿子回答说：“像她这么大的小孩，睡觉是不怕冷的，只怕温度高。温度太高或睡觉盖东西，对几个月大的小孩都是危险的。”儿子这样说着，我只有在旁边老实地听着，因为他说的这些于我而言都是新知识。当年我自己在育儿时，尽管日本也有给年轻父母开办育儿教育课程，但忙于生计、我没有好好地学习；后来就没有了机会、再就是也不需要了。

星期天，我们按计划去中央公园野餐。出门前，儿子首先教我如何给孙女换上纸尿布。记得在三十几年前，日本的育儿专家们是不建议给新生儿使用买来的一次性用的纸尿布的。这种当时只有先进国家才有的一次性用纸尿布，那时还被认为不如棉布尿布透气。所以我们用在儿女身上的还是反复用的棉制尿布、不是纸尿布。换句话，那时使用棉质尿布被认为比使用纸质尿布更为“先进”。换好尿布后，儿子又教我如何为孙女系上婴儿车上的安全带。

待一切就绪，我们就向目的地出发。儿子推着孙女走在前面带路，我妻子跟着儿子走在中间；我看见的则是这样一幅画面：前面是父女——父亲推着女儿走；后面是母子——母亲跟着儿子走。我心里不由得笑了起来。

在绿茵的草地上，我们铺上野外用坐毯，望着蓝蓝的天空，享受着曼哈顿的pizza 。好美啊！我在感叹着。这时，戴着墨镜的孙女更是得意：她顽皮地‘歪’在椅子上，一会儿取下她父亲的眼镜，一会儿夺下她父亲的棒球帽，嘴里咿咿呀呀地、手在舞着脚在蹈着。她的眼睛非常漂亮。她有弯弯的眉毛，棕色的头发，高而挺的鼻子下面是一张爱笑的小嘴巴。她一张嘴，下牙床那两颗又尖又白的小牙便露了出来。当她笑起来时，脸上还会出现两个浅浅的小酒窝。她还有一双十分可爱的小手，手指长长的、白白的；她的皮肤又细又嫩，就像刚出锅的小馒头。她就是一位天使啊！情景之下，我写了一首——《你就是这样》：

欢乐如小鸟，
可爱如熊猫——
人们喜欢的小女孩，
应该是这样。

聪明如精灵，
美丽如孔雀——
人们喜欢的小女孩
应该是这样。

天真如钻石，
灿烂如朝霞——
见到的人心开花，
你就是这样。

活泼如蝴蝶，
玲珑如珍珠——
路过的人都留步，
你就是这样。

四处奔跑，四处寻找，
心目中的美丽。
因为这样的女孩
世界更可爱。

就这样，我和我的另一半按照儿子的安排度过了一个愉快的周末；儿子则顺着孙女的节奏度过了一个愉快的周末；三代人加起来，就把这幸福的日子延续了下去。

这是一个难忘的周末。

2025年秋
//***********************************//
“在世间所有虚幻的追求都过去以后，文学依旧是一片灵魂的净土。”
//***********************************//

A Weekend
Ruiping Li
September 2025

We spent an August weekend in Manhattan: me, my wife, our son and his eight-month-old daughter - our granddaughter. My daughter-in-law happened to be out of town that weekend, and my daughter was only able to stay with us for half the day.

I rarely travel; it's restrictive and tiring, and I am especially unaccustomed to staying in a hotel. But this time, we were visiting our granddaughter, and all those "issues" seemed to have slipped out of my mind. My wife was up early, too; to see them sooner, she made peanut butter bread for us to eat in the car. Unbelievably, we left home before the scheduled departure time!

The weather was beautiful. Although this summer had been hot, autumn arrived earlier than in normal years. Suddenly, the sky had turned higher and bluer, the clouds became whiter and brighter, the wind blew softer and gentler, and the sunlight became exceptionally comfortable ... All these changes gave rise to a feeling—how wonderful life is.

My son had arranged everything for our visit: our daughter came over that afternoon, and we chatted and drank coffee together, then had dinner together. On Monday, my daughter was out of town, so the four of us went on a picnic in Central Park.

I don't know when it started, but my attitude has become submissive: I'm completely confident in everything my son and daughter do or plan, even obedient to them. Now, I defer to my children just as my father listened to me in his later years.

My granddaughter is just eight months old. She has grown a lot in the past two months. She's learned a new head-shaking dance from her aunt; when we asked her to perform, she did it with flying colors. Compared to other children her age, she's more expressive and giggles constantly, sometimes even deliberately making faces to make us laugh.

Dinner was dumplings—a favorite of my daughter and son, and my wife's specialty. My wife rolled the dumpling wrappers, and my daughter helped wrap them. Before dinner, my son fed my granddaughter. My granddaughter was playful, spitting out food, playing with it for a while, then either spilling it on the floor or putting it back in her mouth. Seeing this, I immediately wanted to clean up the mess. My son said calmly, "Dad, don't rush. Wait until she finishes eating before cleaning up." "As long as she's enjoying her meal, spilling some on the floor is fine. Just clean it up afterward," he continued.

After hearing my son's words, I suddenly realized: My parenting "experiences” and my strategies for infant care were still stuck from 30 years ago. How times have changed!

My daughter-in-law and son have a rule: our granddaughter must go to bed around 8:30 p.m. My son knows he has a bad sleep schedule—he is a night owl. So, he doesn't want to pass on his bad habits to the next generation. At 8 o'clock, he changed our granddaughter into pajamas and put her to sleep in her own private room. The room was equipped with a baby monitor, allowing the parents to monitor their child's sleep from every angle. Seeing my granddaughter sleep without a blanket or anything, my wife became concerned and tentatively asked, "Is it okay for her to not cover herself at night? Won't she be cold?" My son replied, "Children her age aren't afraid of cold when sleeping, only of high temperatures. High temperatures or covering yourself with something when sleeping can be dangerous for a child just a few months old." As he spoke, I listened attentively, because everything he said was new to me. When I was raising my own children, although Japan offered parenting courses for young parents, I was so busy I didn't take the time to learn. Eventually, I lost the opportunity and the need for them.

On Sunday, we planned a picnic in Central Park. Before we left, my son first taught me how to change a diaper. I remembered that over thirty years ago, Japanese childcare experts didn't recommend using commercially available disposable diapers for newborns. These disposable diapers, available only in developed countries at the time, were considered less breathable than cotton diapers. So, we used reusable cotton diapers for our children, not disposable ones. In other words, using cotton diapers was considered more "scientific" than using disposable diapers back then. After changing her diaper, my son taught me how to fasten the safety straps on my granddaughter's stroller.

Once everything was ready, we set off for our destination. My son led the way, pushing my granddaughter, while my wife walked in the middle, following my son. I saw this scene: daughter and father in front—the father pushing his daughter, and son and mother behind—the mother following her son. I couldn't help but smile.

On the green lawn, we spread the blankets, gazed at the blue sky, and enjoyed Manhattan pizza. "What a beautiful place!" I exclaimed. Meanwhile, my granddaughter, wearing sunglasses, was even more proud: she playfully leaned back in her chair, alternately taking off her father's glasses and then snatching up his baseball cap, babbling and dancing with her hands and feet. She has beautiful eyes. She has curved eyebrows, brown hair, and a small, smiling mouth beneath a high, straight nose. When she opened her mouth, two small, pointed, white teeth appeared on her lower jaw. When she smiled, two shallow dimples appeared on her face. She also had a pair of adorable little hands, with long, white fingers; her skin was as delicate and tender as a steamed bun fresh from the oven. She was an angel! In my excitement, I wrote a poem—"You Are So":

Cheerful as a bird,
Cute as a panda—
The little girl people love,
That's how it should be.

Smart as an elf,
Beautiful as a peacock—
The little girl people love,
That's how it should be.

Perfect as a diamond,
Brilliant as the morning light—
The faces of those who see you smile,
That's how you are.

Lively as a butterfly,
Elegant as a pearl—
Everyone who sees you stops,
That's how you are.

Running around, searching around,
The beauty in my heart.
Because of girls like this, the world is so great.

As so, we spent a delightful weekend, following our children’s plans. Our son, in turn, enjoyed a joyful weekend, following his daughter’s plans; and together, these three generations continue the beauty of life.

It was an unforgettable weekend.

//==========================//
“After all the illusory pursuits of the world have passed, literature remains a harbor for the soul.”
//==========================//